If I don’t rupture something while trying to stuff one more piece of pie into my face, followed by a piece of turkey, followed by a tiny slice of cake, followed by a bite or two of potatoes, followed by just one more roll, hubby and I will be “Christmas shopping” again on Black Friday. At least that’s what we tell our teens, so they willingly babysit their younger siblings.
In reality, we hit Sam’s Club for the holiday samples and cheap jump drives. Then we stop in at Cracker Barrel for a leisurely breakfast, and lollygag around until the movie theater opens. Sometimes, we watch two movies in a row, and then share a big plate of nachos at the Mexican restaurant. When we return home late in the day, the kids hide their eyes, and we make a loud production of carrying in “all of these Christmas presents.” It’s amazing how much noise you can make with two old Wal-mart bags and a Happy Meal box that’s been stuffed under the back seat for three weeks. It might seem a bit unethical, but they’ll figure it out when they have kids of their own. Probably about the same time they realize why we are so serious about not being disturbed during our Sunday afternoon “nap.”
Given the fact that I am preparing Thanksgiving dinner for fifty people, I’m a little short on writing time. I tried to take a few minutes for deep, introspective thoughts of thankfulness, hoping I would be inspired to write something profound. But all I can think about is food. When it comes down to it, that’s what makes this a great holiday! So, I offer you my ode to Thanksgiving dinner:
Turkey is divine and stuffing is heaven!
Give me some yeast rolls with plenty of leaven
Piles of potatoes mashed with real butter
And desserts that will cause me to moan and to mutter
Green bean casserole isn’t that great
But we make up for it with carbohydrates
Noodles, and gravy, and oysters in bread
Corn pudding and chowder fill my tummy like lead
Even our veggies don’t care to be healthy
Cheese and butter make broccoli feel wealthy
Yams with brown sugar and lots of marshmallows
Fruit that is drowning in a rainbow of Jellos
Cranberries are jellied and sliced into rounds
Persimmons are made to pack on the pounds
Apples and pumpkins are eaten in pies
And each year produces a chocolate surprise
I briefly mentioned my love of the turkey
I especially enjoy the ones that are girthy
Turkeys are healthy, that can’t be denied
At least they are ‘til we serve ‘em deep fried
Yes, I am thankful at this time of year
For friends and family and lots of good cheer
And it was nice of the pilgrims to establish a day
For us to give thanks and remember to pray
But the Lord knows our hearts and sees every deed
Nothing is hidden, not sin, lust or greed
So He knows I’m really here for the food
It puts a glutton like me in a jolly right mood!
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