Every now and then I need a good rant session. Most recently I was provoked to ranting by the announcement that Ken and Barbie are going their separate ways. Some are calling it an actual divorce. This is the most ridiculous publicity stunt in the history of toy making.
Part of my disgust comes straight from the pits of Mattel. They are suggesting that you use the Barbie/Ken break up to prepare your child for the likelihood that they will have to deal with divorced parents.
Should a toy company profit from the burden it lays upon a child who is already living in an insecure and unstable world? Should the top news story of the hour be a clip of an idiot toy executive trying to justify his stupid marketing ploy by exploiting the emotions of children who might very well be struggling with parental separation and divorce? Really! If Barbie and Ken can’t hold it together, what chance do mom and dad have?
Besides, how do you use childless Ken and Barbie to “prepare” a kid for the possibility of divorce?
“Now, honey, I know you are really upset about this, but you’ll see that Ken still loves Barbie, he’s just not “in love” with her. It doesn’t change his feelings for you at all!”
“You see dear, we are buying an extra toy box so you can keep Ken’s things separate from Barbie’s. Just remember that even though he won’t be living in the Malibu Beach House anymore, they are still going to be friends. Nothing will change, he’s just sleeping somewhere else. Probably at Midge’s house where the jerk has been “sleeping” for years! Oh, sorry, honey, Mommy didn’t mean to say that out loud. I still love Ken and I’m sure if a man with absolutely no genitalia was capable of reproducing he would be a very good single parent.”
“Now, let’s divvy up the goods. Barbie gets the townhouse, the beach house and the country cottage. She should also get the airplane, the dentist’s office, the mini van, the corvette, the limo, the swimming pool, the tennis court, all of the pink pets and at least half of the white ones. She should keep the diamonds and the forty-two various wedding dresses. We’ll also give her Ken’s clothes so she’ll have something comfy to mope around in for the next six months until Mattel creates a new love interest for her. And she really should get the carrying case since her name is emblazoned across the front.”
“What the heck, let’s just give her everything! What kind of man wants a pink chifforobe anyway? Forget the new toy box, Ken will fit nicely in this old cracker carton. Serves the loser right for asking Skipper to babysit when he doesn’t even have kids! Oh, sorry, sweetie, I shouldn’t have said that.”
Seriously, I don’t want to place all the blame on Ken, after all it takes two to Tango. Although, Barbie is the only one with bendable knees so I’m guessing she did more than her fair share of that dance.
The truth is deep down I’m very hurt. Barbie and Ken have been with me since the moment I took my first breath. For years my great-grandma owned a doll shop. She had an innocent love for all things related to childhood and it carried over into her every day life.
She kept a Barbie display in her store window year round. Christmas found Barbie and friends decorating a tree with tiny, hand-made ornaments or curled up next to the fireplace knitting a new stocking. Miniature gifts were beautifully wrapped and the table was set with tiny, hand-painted Christmas dishes.
A month later the New Year’s display wasn’t complete without bits of shredded confetti covering Barbie’s floor. Then, come Valentine’s Day, Ken and Barbie would be displayed at a dance complete with crepe paper streamers and a hi-fi in the corner. And you wouldn’t believe the tiny little eggs she decorated for the Easter scene!
Grandma was an excellent seamstress and her attention to detail was amazing. She often made dresses for me with little Barbie dresses to match. Many of the doll clothes she stitched together 30+ years ago have been handed down to my own daughters.
Leave a Reply